Alright, this is a tough one.  I had been working on a draft for a few days (after thinking it over in my head for over a week).  The subject was going to be about the trials and tribulations of friendship.  I was going to talk about the barriers that I have set up in my life that limits the number of friends I have and how perhaps it is safer that way.  The subject came to mind when a friend that I have not seen in 27 years was letdown by her best friend.  Her conclusion was that, in the end each and everyone of us are alone.  I was having difficulty figuring out the direction on wanted to go with it.  I also did not want it to sound like a pity paper lamenting my life because that is far from reality.  Get to the point Murdock.  I deleted all I had written this morning.  Perhaps one of these days I will resurrect it.  But for now I wanted to talk for just  a moment about a young Sailor that I worked with at Navy Recruiting District Seattle.  Petty Officer Ruiz was a very quiet, unassuming young man.  Thin and not very tall, it was easy for him to get lost in a crowd.  He did not have the loud, boisterous personality that you find with most Boatswain's Mates.  He was very difficult to get to know because of his quiet demeanor.  Whenever I saw him I was always trying to get him to crack a smile because he always looked so somber and serious.  Aside from that, he was very good at his job.  He was able to put people in the Navy and he was a major contributor to his recruiting station being the Large Station of the Year in 2009 and his Zone being Zone of the Year for 2009.  He transferred from NRD Seattle and transferred to a Mobile Security Squadron earlier this year.  The last time I saw him I pinned a Navy Achievement Medal on his chest for his dedication to the mission.  Yesterday I found out Petty Officer Ruiz passed away in San Diego.  I don't have much information on it other than he was not feeling well after finishing physical training.  He went home and never showed up for work the next day.  My plan for a Friday evening was to go to bed early.  I was exhausted after another week of Pashto training and I had stayed up late on Thursday preparing my presentation on Buzkashi (the national sport of Afghanistan) that I had to deliver in Pashto.  A few moments after finding out about Petty Officer Ruiz I received a text from my brother David inviting me to dinner.  It seemed all that more important to be around people and celebrate life in the simplest way and I gladly accepted the invite.  As always it was good to be in my brother's dining room, surrounded by good people who love me unconditionally.  The neighbors came over to join in the festivities, and I quietly reveled in the warmth of being surrounded by family and friends. It amazes me that as humans it seems to takes tragedies or life threatening situations to provide the proper perspective on life and how we should live it.  You are always hearing about someone who was within an inch of losing their life and when they recover they talk about how they look at things differently now.  They appreciate life and plan to live it to the fullest and they appreciate family and friends that much more.  But why wait to have a life altering experience to truly appreciate and respect what you have?   We get so wrapped up in the minutiae of life that we never take a step back to look within and really feel and experience every moment.  Soak it in, allow yourself to get lost in the moment and appreciate what you have.  Doesn't that make life that much richer?  Does it open you up to possible pain and disappointment?  Probably.  Friends will hurt you, family will disappoint, but that should not prevent you from living life with your eyes and heart open.  Do not waste a moment.  Tennyson wrote: 

I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

I went on the Facebook page of Petty Officer Ruiz.  It was interesting to see that it had turned into a place to post condolences to a departed friend (mostly in Spanish).  I was struck by what Petty Officer Ruiz wrote for his bio.  I have copied it here, leaving it in capital letters just as it appeared on his page.  I am not sure if this comes from something he read or if it was his original work.  Still, it allows one last opportunity to see inside Ismael Ruiz...rest in peace Shipmate:


I BELIEVE THAT EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. PEOPLE CHANGE SO THAT YOU CAN LEARN TO LET GO, THINGS GO WRONG SO THAT YOU APPRECIATE THEM WHEN THERE RIGHT, YOU BELIEVE LIES SO YOU EVENTUALLY LEARN TO TRUST NO ONE BUT YOURSELF, AND SOMETIMES GOOD THINGS FALL APART SO BETTER THINGS CAN FALL TOGETHER. IMPERFECTION IS BEAUTY, MADNESS IS GENIUS. AND ITS BETTER TO BE ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS THEN ABSOLUTELY BORING. AND WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT, I LET THEM THINK WHAT THEY WANT. IF THEY CARE ENOUGH TO BOTHER WITH WHAT I DO, THEN IM ALREADY BETTER THEN THEM.