In the waning minutes of 2011 I figured I would provide one more post to give a very quick view of the year. It is cold and my heater isn't working so I can't sit here to long without freezing. January 2011 found me in Washington DC, finishing up my last month of Pashto training and enjoying my last real month of freedom before the deployment started in earnest. It was the last month that I had regular hours and was able to come and go as I wished, not having to run around in a convoy of Mad Max vehicles, or locked down in an open bay barracks in a state I hope to never visit again. I was living in the basement of a former Assistant Secretary of Commerce sharing it with one of my classmates and four cats. I was close enough that I could visit my brother David and his wonderful wife and daughter Marybeth and Emma for some family time and a hot meal. Most of my time was studying a language I still haven't mastered and never will. My closest friend was a calico cat named Dandelion.
February I made my first trip to Afghanistan to visit Kunar and get a feel for what challenges lay ahead for the team I had yet to meet. I remember the first time I climbed into one of the massive armored trucks and rolled out of the base and on to the roads of Kunar. "So this is what I have to look forward too...hmmm." The trip to Afghanistan, and the month, went by quickly even with the snowstorm in Bagram that kept us stranded for four days unable to go anywhere. Before I knew it March came around and I was home for just a few days before heading back to Camp Atterbury, Indiana. I actually spent the first week of February there with the small group of PRT COs, but when we returned our teams had started to form. March was filled with meeting the team and getting to know everyone as we started our training. By the end of the month the entire team was together. April, May and the first part of June are a blur as we "formed the tribe" learned how to be soldiers, shot lots of weapons and lived in open bay barracks together. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't pleasant and more than anything we just wanted to get out of there so we could start the deployment. Having already been to Kunar I knew our living conditions would be better in Afghanistan. It was sometimes difficult for them to believe that, so it was great to see their eyes light up and their smiles light their faces as they arrived.
But, before we left for Kunar, we were allowed to go home for a week. As luck would have it that was the week Bob graduated from Oregon State. It was wonderful to see him in the ceremony. I was more nervous and excited for him heading off on his adventure to Los Angeles than I was for my deployment. He has done so well, I couldn't be prouder. The week at home culminated in a graduation party at the beautiful home of my sister Molly and her husband Steve. It was nice to see everyone celebrating Bob and Rachel's graduation. It was a good way to finish the trip. Going to the airport with Midori and Sara, I was a blubbering fool. It was difficult to walk away from them and head to the plane...what was I doing?
Since July everything has run together. This has been the toughest job I have ever had, although it has changed a bit since returning from R&R. The leadership challenges have been endless and never have I questioned myself or my abilities than I did in the first six months. My leadership style changed...for a variety of reasons, and now I kick myself for not trusting my instincts and doing what I know how to do. Now, I am more calm and can see more clearly what I need to do. There is still plenty of fog, but I can see my way through it now (with the help of a great team). Some of the stories will have to wait to be told until I get home...it is just better that way.
Christmas day I spent most of the time up on our observation post eating a Christmas lunch with our squad that is up there keeping us safe. The Sergeant Major and I spent about three and a half hours with them before the helo came and took us back down to the base. Later my boss flew in to join us for Christmas dinner. We spent the first hour serving up dinner for the troops. I was responsible for the ham and the cheesiest macaroni and cheese I have ever seen. After dinner the boss stayed for a little bit and then we put him on a helo and he was off. The evening ended standing around the fire pit enjoying the company of a few Soldiers and Sailors who weren't quite ready to call in a night.
Jumping back to November, I believe the greatest moment of the entire year was walking into my house for the first time and having Midori leap into my arms. I wasn't sure what her reaction would be when I surprised her...it was better than anything I could imagine. The worst moment was perhaps when I realized how much time I wasted during the two weeks I was home. I was sick the first three or four days and then made Midori sick. Once I was healthy I should have spent more quality time with both Midori and Sean. Instead I was in a daze for most of it, doing as little as possible and wasting precious time. Regrets suck.
So that brings us to the last hour of the year. There is a lame party at the USO building but I will probably go out and join the gang standing around the fire pit again. Better than sitting at the computer in this cold room I suppose. All in all it has been a good year...challenging, educational, frustrating. I have made some lifelong friends, that is certain. I look forward to new challenges in the year to come...Happy New Year.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
Once More into the Breach
I have been back in Afghanistan for a little over a week now. I arrived back in Kunar last Thursday afternoon. I sat down with my executive officer and sergeant major for about an hour and received a quick update before retiring to my room to settle down to a long winter's nap. I started fresh the next morning after the best sleep in a week after traveling from Seattle to Atlanta to Kuwait to Bagram to Jalalabad to Asadabad. The next day I was back at it.
When I started my travel, I wondered how I would feel coming back. To spend five months in this place, then go home for a short time knowing all along I would have to come back, was a little strange while I was home. But once I arrived it was just like riding a bike. This place, after all, is where I work. This is my job and I have committed to seeing it through. For the first few days of course I heard "welcome back" over and over and answered the questions about how my leave was and how the family was. I didn't mind it, and actually appreciated it, but did not feel completely back into it until that eventually subsided. It was great to see all the members of the team and I was excited to start working to put a dent in this difficult mission.
By the second full day I was jumping on a helicopter to take a very short trip to another FOB so that I could walk over to the Governor's compound to attend a large gathering. Since our guys already had training scheduled on the FOB, Abe (our Rule of Law guy) and I decided to catch a quick flight so we could attend without disrupting the schedule of the guys who would normally drive us over. The meeting was the culmination of an effort that had been going on for years to bring to an end a major feud between two families in Kunar. As the story goes it started over a woman over 35 years ago. Ever since then they had been at war with each other. The two families are from the same tribe and both are prominent in the province. One family was headed by Malik Zarin who was the top elder in Kunar until a child with a suicide vest killed him back in April. The other family includes a member of Parliament. So there was quite a bit of power and it was in everyone's best interest to end the feud.
So, about three months ago a 45 man jirga was appointed and started in earnest on brokering a peace agreement. They created a document that both families would be required to sign and honor. The agreement included compensation on both sides for injustices that may have taken place over the years. Throughout the feud at least 20 family members had been killed with many more injured or caught in the crossfire. A jirga (I knew you were wondering) is a group of elders that decide on legal or tribal issues. Pashtunwali is the code that all Pashtuns live by with a very specific set of principles that cover everything that includes providing shelter to strangers, revenge, honor, loyalty, etc. Because this jirga had come up with the agreement and because the heads of the two families signed it, the feud is now over. Everyone we spoke to said that the entire families would respect the agreement and no more blood would be spilled. They would now live as brothers. The meeting was attended my parliamentarians and ministers from Kabul and what seemed like every elder in Kunar. The shura hall probably held 300 people and the courtyard in the governor's compound was full of hundreds more listening to the speeches. The culminating event was literally bringing family members up on the stage to hug each other in a show of brotherhood. Thirty-five years of strife ended in one day and sealed with hugs.
So, I am back in the grind. My XO headed home for his leave (which means I am busier than usual) and I have settled back into the same battle rhythm I was in before I went home. Now, it is time to put a dent in this mission we have been tasked with and get this team home on time.
When I started my travel, I wondered how I would feel coming back. To spend five months in this place, then go home for a short time knowing all along I would have to come back, was a little strange while I was home. But once I arrived it was just like riding a bike. This place, after all, is where I work. This is my job and I have committed to seeing it through. For the first few days of course I heard "welcome back" over and over and answered the questions about how my leave was and how the family was. I didn't mind it, and actually appreciated it, but did not feel completely back into it until that eventually subsided. It was great to see all the members of the team and I was excited to start working to put a dent in this difficult mission.
By the second full day I was jumping on a helicopter to take a very short trip to another FOB so that I could walk over to the Governor's compound to attend a large gathering. Since our guys already had training scheduled on the FOB, Abe (our Rule of Law guy) and I decided to catch a quick flight so we could attend without disrupting the schedule of the guys who would normally drive us over. The meeting was the culmination of an effort that had been going on for years to bring to an end a major feud between two families in Kunar. As the story goes it started over a woman over 35 years ago. Ever since then they had been at war with each other. The two families are from the same tribe and both are prominent in the province. One family was headed by Malik Zarin who was the top elder in Kunar until a child with a suicide vest killed him back in April. The other family includes a member of Parliament. So there was quite a bit of power and it was in everyone's best interest to end the feud.
So, about three months ago a 45 man jirga was appointed and started in earnest on brokering a peace agreement. They created a document that both families would be required to sign and honor. The agreement included compensation on both sides for injustices that may have taken place over the years. Throughout the feud at least 20 family members had been killed with many more injured or caught in the crossfire. A jirga (I knew you were wondering) is a group of elders that decide on legal or tribal issues. Pashtunwali is the code that all Pashtuns live by with a very specific set of principles that cover everything that includes providing shelter to strangers, revenge, honor, loyalty, etc. Because this jirga had come up with the agreement and because the heads of the two families signed it, the feud is now over. Everyone we spoke to said that the entire families would respect the agreement and no more blood would be spilled. They would now live as brothers. The meeting was attended my parliamentarians and ministers from Kabul and what seemed like every elder in Kunar. The shura hall probably held 300 people and the courtyard in the governor's compound was full of hundreds more listening to the speeches. The culminating event was literally bringing family members up on the stage to hug each other in a show of brotherhood. Thirty-five years of strife ended in one day and sealed with hugs.
So, I am back in the grind. My XO headed home for his leave (which means I am busier than usual) and I have settled back into the same battle rhythm I was in before I went home. Now, it is time to put a dent in this mission we have been tasked with and get this team home on time.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
R&R Comes to an end
I knew, way back when this journey started, that there was an opportunity for everyone to get home for two weeks of rest and relaxation (R&R). But it was difficult for me to wrap my mind around. In the Navy, when the ship leaves on deployment, everyone is there throughout the deployment. We don't send people home unless it is for an emergency. It was especially foreign to me to leave the command as the commanding officer. To leave the command in the middle of deployment seemed like a betrayal of the team and was not sure how much "rest and relaxation" would happen knowing the team was continuing to go into harm's way without me.
But deploying to a war zone on the ground is not the same as deploying on a ship. At least on the ship there is the occasional respite from duty each time they pull into some exotic port and enjoy a few days of liberty. In Afghanistan, there is no break, no exotic ports, no liberty. I realized in October that not only did I need to use my R&R, but the team needed me to use it. I needed to decompress and they needed to continue the mission without me for awhile. My Executive Officer needed to have the opportunity to develop by running the show and participating in missions.
So, on the 14th of November I stepped onboard a helo and started the long journey home. The first leg was a thirty minute flight to Jalalabad. It did not start out well, as five minutes into the flight I realized my butt was too comfortable (what)? I was sitting evenly on the canvas seat in the helicopter, which was a bad sign. I reached down with my right hand and confirmed my suspicion...and my heart fell. Moments before leaving I had changed my uniform pants to a clean pair. Their are eight pockets in the pants, so it is always a process to move everything over from the old pair to the new pair. As luck would happen, I checked seven pockets when I switched out. Sitting in the bottom of the cabinet in my room was a dirty pair of camouflage pants with a wallet in the back pocket...idiot. I wasn't going to get anywhere without my ID card which was sitting in that wallet which was in the back pocket of the camouflage pants in the bottom of the cabinet in my room. This was not starting well.
As luck would have it, one of my guys was on another flight later in the morning. There were four of us leaving on R&R but only three of us were manifested on the early flight, so I knew Petty Officer Ruiz was going to be leaving the base within a couple of hours. As soon the the helo landed in Jalalabad, I called back to my Operations Officer. The call went something like this:
Where are you right now?
I am outside behind the headquarters building sir.
Do me a favor and walk over to my room. Tell me when you are there.
Alright sir, I am here.
Enter this code into the cipher lock ****. Let me know when you are in.
I'm in sir.
Walk forward to the cabinet on your right, open up the door on the left.
Okay, got it.
Do you see a pair of pants laying there unfolded?
Yes sir.
Pick them up, and take the wallet out of the back pocket.
(Snickering and laughter)got it sir.
Please take the wallet and give it to Petty Officer Ruiz before he jumps on the helo.
No problem, consider it done.
Once again my guys came through in the clutch. Petty Officer Ruiz delivered the wallet just a couple of hours later and we were all able to fly out of Jalalabad later that day. The next leg took us to Bagram Airfield where we would catch a flight to Kuwait. While two of the guys were able to get out to Kuwait early the next morning, I was stuck in Bagram for about thirty six hours before getting on a C-130 in the middle of the night, packed like sardines in uncomfortable seats (sitting sideways) for about five and a half hours. After arriving in Kuwait, we were told that we would be flying out of Kuwait in a couple of days so to get comfortable and come back for a Friday flight ( I had started traveling on Monday and this was now Wednesday). I had taken a minimalist packing tact and brought only a back pack with a few changes of underwear and my computer. Once I realized I was going to be there for a couple of days, I went to the exchange and bought a pair of running shoes. I figured I might as well work out for a couple of days rather than laying around. But on Thursday morning, before I could even try on the shoes they called our flight number over the loudspeaker. So we all assembled and were told we had 45 minutes to gather our stuff and report with our bags to catch an earlier flight. I wasn't going to complain. That night we were heading on the long, long journey to Atlanta. I was squeezed into a middle seat all the way from Kuwait to Ireland and Ireland to Atlanta...lovely.
Once in Atlanta, since no one knew I was coming home, I decided I better try and connect with someone at home to pick me up. It is great having a brother living in the area, so I pulled out my stateside phone and attempted to call Mike, but quickly found out my phone was no longer activated. Bummer. I went to a pay as you go email station and stuck a five dollar bill in the slot which gave me about five minutes to write an email to Mike and ask him to pick me up in Seattle later that afternoon. Later, I spied a Major who had been on the same journey with me from Kuwait waiting at my gate. He was nice enough to lend me his phone and I was able to connect with Mike. Before the flight left I stopped by the gift store and bought myself some Nyquil since I felt my head and chest filling up with crud and my general health plummeting. The Nyquil knocked me out on the flight to Seattle.
Of course (time to cut this short), it was all worth it when I walked through the door and Midori jumped into my arms. It has been a great trip despite being sick for the first few days (and then giving Midori my cold). A great Thanksgiving at Molly's and a nice visit to Oregon. The time spent with my family and with old friends was a great way to recharge the batteries. Now it is time to get a haircut, pack up and head back for the final three months of a rewarding but very challenging tour...hope I remember my wallet.
But deploying to a war zone on the ground is not the same as deploying on a ship. At least on the ship there is the occasional respite from duty each time they pull into some exotic port and enjoy a few days of liberty. In Afghanistan, there is no break, no exotic ports, no liberty. I realized in October that not only did I need to use my R&R, but the team needed me to use it. I needed to decompress and they needed to continue the mission without me for awhile. My Executive Officer needed to have the opportunity to develop by running the show and participating in missions.
So, on the 14th of November I stepped onboard a helo and started the long journey home. The first leg was a thirty minute flight to Jalalabad. It did not start out well, as five minutes into the flight I realized my butt was too comfortable (what)? I was sitting evenly on the canvas seat in the helicopter, which was a bad sign. I reached down with my right hand and confirmed my suspicion...and my heart fell. Moments before leaving I had changed my uniform pants to a clean pair. Their are eight pockets in the pants, so it is always a process to move everything over from the old pair to the new pair. As luck would happen, I checked seven pockets when I switched out. Sitting in the bottom of the cabinet in my room was a dirty pair of camouflage pants with a wallet in the back pocket...idiot. I wasn't going to get anywhere without my ID card which was sitting in that wallet which was in the back pocket of the camouflage pants in the bottom of the cabinet in my room. This was not starting well.
As luck would have it, one of my guys was on another flight later in the morning. There were four of us leaving on R&R but only three of us were manifested on the early flight, so I knew Petty Officer Ruiz was going to be leaving the base within a couple of hours. As soon the the helo landed in Jalalabad, I called back to my Operations Officer. The call went something like this:
Where are you right now?
I am outside behind the headquarters building sir.
Do me a favor and walk over to my room. Tell me when you are there.
Alright sir, I am here.
Enter this code into the cipher lock ****. Let me know when you are in.
I'm in sir.
Walk forward to the cabinet on your right, open up the door on the left.
Okay, got it.
Do you see a pair of pants laying there unfolded?
Yes sir.
Pick them up, and take the wallet out of the back pocket.
(Snickering and laughter)got it sir.
Please take the wallet and give it to Petty Officer Ruiz before he jumps on the helo.
No problem, consider it done.
Once again my guys came through in the clutch. Petty Officer Ruiz delivered the wallet just a couple of hours later and we were all able to fly out of Jalalabad later that day. The next leg took us to Bagram Airfield where we would catch a flight to Kuwait. While two of the guys were able to get out to Kuwait early the next morning, I was stuck in Bagram for about thirty six hours before getting on a C-130 in the middle of the night, packed like sardines in uncomfortable seats (sitting sideways) for about five and a half hours. After arriving in Kuwait, we were told that we would be flying out of Kuwait in a couple of days so to get comfortable and come back for a Friday flight ( I had started traveling on Monday and this was now Wednesday). I had taken a minimalist packing tact and brought only a back pack with a few changes of underwear and my computer. Once I realized I was going to be there for a couple of days, I went to the exchange and bought a pair of running shoes. I figured I might as well work out for a couple of days rather than laying around. But on Thursday morning, before I could even try on the shoes they called our flight number over the loudspeaker. So we all assembled and were told we had 45 minutes to gather our stuff and report with our bags to catch an earlier flight. I wasn't going to complain. That night we were heading on the long, long journey to Atlanta. I was squeezed into a middle seat all the way from Kuwait to Ireland and Ireland to Atlanta...lovely.
Once in Atlanta, since no one knew I was coming home, I decided I better try and connect with someone at home to pick me up. It is great having a brother living in the area, so I pulled out my stateside phone and attempted to call Mike, but quickly found out my phone was no longer activated. Bummer. I went to a pay as you go email station and stuck a five dollar bill in the slot which gave me about five minutes to write an email to Mike and ask him to pick me up in Seattle later that afternoon. Later, I spied a Major who had been on the same journey with me from Kuwait waiting at my gate. He was nice enough to lend me his phone and I was able to connect with Mike. Before the flight left I stopped by the gift store and bought myself some Nyquil since I felt my head and chest filling up with crud and my general health plummeting. The Nyquil knocked me out on the flight to Seattle.
Of course (time to cut this short), it was all worth it when I walked through the door and Midori jumped into my arms. It has been a great trip despite being sick for the first few days (and then giving Midori my cold). A great Thanksgiving at Molly's and a nice visit to Oregon. The time spent with my family and with old friends was a great way to recharge the batteries. Now it is time to get a haircut, pack up and head back for the final three months of a rewarding but very challenging tour...hope I remember my wallet.
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