Happy New Year

In the waning minutes of 2011 I figured I would provide one more post to give a very quick view of the year.  It is cold and my heater isn't working so I can't sit here to long without freezing.  January 2011 found me in Washington DC, finishing up my last month of Pashto training and enjoying my last real month of freedom before the deployment started in earnest.  It was the last month that I had regular hours and was able to come and go as I wished, not having to run around in a convoy of Mad Max vehicles, or locked down in an open bay barracks in a state I hope to never visit again.  I was living in the basement of a former Assistant Secretary of Commerce sharing it with one of my classmates and four cats.  I was close enough that I could visit my brother David and his wonderful wife and daughter Marybeth and Emma for some family time and a hot meal.  Most of my time was studying a language I still haven't mastered and never will.  My closest friend was a calico cat named Dandelion.

February I made my first trip to Afghanistan to visit Kunar and get a feel for what challenges lay ahead for the team I had yet to meet.  I remember the first time I climbed into one of the massive armored trucks and rolled out of the base and on to the roads of Kunar. "So this is what I have to look forward too...hmmm."  The trip to Afghanistan, and the month, went by quickly even with the snowstorm in Bagram that kept us stranded for four days unable to go anywhere.  Before I knew it March came around and I was home for just a few days before heading back to Camp Atterbury, Indiana.  I actually spent the first week of February there with the small group of PRT COs, but when we returned our teams had started to form.  March was filled with meeting the team and getting to know everyone as we started our training.  By the end of the month the entire team was together.  April, May and the first part of June are a blur as we "formed the tribe" learned how to be soldiers, shot lots of weapons and lived in open bay barracks together.  It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't pleasant and more than anything we just wanted to get out of there so we could start the deployment.  Having already been to Kunar I knew our living conditions would be better in Afghanistan.  It was sometimes difficult for them to believe that, so it was great to see their eyes light up and their smiles light their faces as they arrived. 

But, before we left for Kunar, we were allowed to go home for a week.  As luck would have it that was the week Bob graduated from Oregon State.  It was wonderful to see him in the ceremony.  I was more nervous and excited for him heading off on his adventure to Los Angeles than I was for my deployment.  He has done so well, I couldn't be prouder.  The week at home culminated in a graduation party at the beautiful home of my sister Molly and her husband Steve.  It was nice to see everyone celebrating Bob and Rachel's graduation.  It was a good way to finish the trip.  Going to the airport with Midori and Sara, I was a blubbering fool. It was difficult to walk away  from them and head to the plane...what was I doing?

Since July everything has run together.  This has been the toughest job I have ever had, although it has changed a bit since returning from R&R.  The leadership challenges have been endless and never have I questioned myself or my abilities than I did in the first six months.  My leadership style changed...for a variety of reasons, and now I kick myself for not trusting my instincts and doing what I know how to do.  Now, I am more calm and can see more clearly what I need to do.  There is still plenty of fog, but I can see my way through it now (with the help of a great team).  Some of the stories will have to wait to be told until I get home...it is just better that way.

Christmas day I spent most of the time up on our observation post eating a Christmas lunch with our squad that is up there keeping us safe.  The Sergeant Major and I spent about three and a half hours with them before the helo came and took us back down to the base.  Later my boss flew in to join us for Christmas dinner.  We spent the first hour serving up dinner for the troops.  I was responsible for the ham and the cheesiest macaroni and cheese I have ever seen.  After dinner the boss stayed for a little bit and then we put him on a helo and he was off.  The evening ended standing around the fire pit enjoying the company of a few Soldiers and Sailors who weren't quite ready to call in a night. 

Jumping back to November, I believe the greatest moment of the entire year was walking into my house for the first time and having Midori leap into my arms.  I wasn't sure what her reaction would be when I surprised her...it was better than anything I could imagine.  The worst moment was perhaps when I realized how much time I wasted during the two weeks I was home.  I was sick the first three or four days and then made Midori sick.  Once I was healthy I should have spent more quality time with both Midori and Sean.  Instead I was in a daze for most of it, doing as little as possible and wasting precious time.  Regrets suck.

So that brings us to the last hour of the year.  There is a lame party at the USO building but I will probably go out and join the gang standing around the fire pit again.  Better than sitting at the computer in this cold room I suppose.  All in all it has been a good year...challenging, educational, frustrating.  I have made some lifelong friends, that is certain.  I look forward to new challenges in the year to come...Happy New Year.